Posts tagged ‘Cars’

Picking up Chicks

A stallion and a chicken are playing on a field. Suddenly the stallion falls into a deep mud hole sinking fast.

The stallion yells to the chicken to run up to the farmer to get help to pull him up.

The chicken runs up to the farm, but she can’t find the farmer, however the chicken is  quite an energetic chicken so she takes the farmers new Audi S8 car, driving it down to the mud hole where the horse is fighting for his life.

The chicken ties a rope to the bumper of the car and throws the other end to the horse and pulls him out of the mud hole and into safety.

A few days later the stallion and the chicken plays in the field again.
Suddenly the chicken falls into the mud hole.

Run get the farmer, the chicken yells to the horse.

The horse responds calmly. I can just stand over the mud hole and you can grab a hold of my gear and I’ll pull you up.

So the chicken grabs a hold of the horse’s equipment and is pulled up to safety again.

The moral in the story is that if you are hung like a horse you don’t need a nice car to pick up chicks…

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Exam Questions – and Answers…

No matter how far our exams are dumbed down, it seems it’s not far enough for today’s pupils. 

But rather than admit defeat in the face of tricky questions, some decide to take a more creative approach to their answers.
After scouring exam papers and speaking to teachers, humorist Richard Benson has collected the worst student howlers in a new book.
You won’t know whether to laugh – or cry. 
 

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18

He saw a couple in a car, with the interior light on.

He got closer to the car and saw a young man behind the wheel, reading a computer magazine and a young woman on the rear seat, knitting.

Puzzled by this surprising situation, the cop walked over to the car and knocked on the window.

“Yes, officer?”

“What are you doing?”

“Well, isn’t it obvious? I’m reading a magazine.”

Pointing to the young woman, the cop asked, “And her, what is she doing?”

The young man shrugged, “I believe she’s knitting a pullover.”

The cop was totally confused. A young couple alone in a car at night and nothing obscene is happening!

“What’s your age, young man?”

” I’m 22, sir.”

“And her, what’s her age?

The young man looks at his watch and said, “She’ll be 18 in 20 minutes.” ;))

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Snow i Netherlands vs Snow in Norway

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Snow in The Netherlands

Trains are cancelled, buses don’t ride any more, people avoid driving cars.

Snow in Norway

No problems, in 10 minutes you can move on!