Posts tagged ‘Cheating’

You can’t cheat death





Twilight Breakup Reactions

The untold story of Barbie’s life…

In one way or another most of us has some kind of a relationship to Barbie, the doll of every 12 year old’s dreams (and lots of other ages too).
She is probably the reason half of us has some kind of a sick view on body ideals and grow up with eating disorders and she has a whole lot of people out there that love to hate her.

Every now and then I have found pictures posted on facebook or other places by someone with a bit more fantasy than myself that has modernized Barbie just that little bit extra to make her the strong, independant woman we all can look up to (or fear).

During studies Party Barbie attended lots of parties with her sorority friends.

Some times Barbie had too much fun and she turned into Sorority Slut Barbie.

Barbie wasn’t a rich girl during her studies and she had to get a job on the side. Exotic Dancer barbie had great success in her job and she managed to finance her studies with this job.

Due to her job, she met many strange people and then Barbie really started exploring her own boundaries. Bondage Barbie had lots of fun.

A lot of experimenting follows

One day Barbie started feeling unwell and realized she had become pregnant

Then Barbie met Ken and they started dating

With this Barbie calmed down a bit and she was happy with Ken.
Barbie got a normal job in an office and turned into the MadMen Barbie.

One day Barbie and Ken moved in together and we got the Long Term Relationship Barbie

In the modern family both Barbie and Ken had a few kids before they met and we could find the whole extended family in the My Kids – Your Kids – Our Kids Barbie.

The whole Long Term Relationship thing is not for our Barbie. She ends up cheating on Ken with Jim. Ken is horrified.

Ken rages and Barbie snaps and a hostage situation ends badly for poor Ken.

Unfortunately Barbie gets a thrill of the Kill and we now have to look out for Serial Killer Barbie

But Of course Barbie is a modern housewife after all…
She cleans her crime scene with bleach!

And for Halloween Serial Killer Barbie is having fun with her kids.

Then – Repenting what she has done – Barbie starts testing out drugs in the new version Party Barbie

Of course this doesn’t work out so well and Doped Out Barbie is a symbol of that

When she comes down from her trip Babie gets sick and Barfing Barbie can be found in stores all over.

Unfortunately one day barbie is out driving while on drugs and she has an accident.

The accident causes her to temporarily become Wheel Chair Barbie.

All the kids are taken from her by child support and with nothing left Barbie joins the army and is sent to Afganistan.

After this no-one heard from Barbie apart from the occational zombie spotting.

Wish you would have searched the freezer

Old Agatha arrived heaven and knocked the Pearl gate and was immediately let in. She wandered around for a while and suddenly she caught the glimpse of her best friend, Louise, and hurried over to have a chat with her.

A – Hey Louise, Nice to see you but why are you up her?
L – Well, you see, I froze to death..
A – Wow. That cant have been a good way to pass.
L – Nah, wasnt that bad actually. As soon as the shaking and shivering passed I felt this warm spread in me and the next thing I knew I was here. But what about you? Why are you here.
A – You see. I was pretty convinced that my husband was cheating on me and I decided to come home early from work one day to check up on my suspicion. I arrived home yesterday and he was just sitting in the chair like nothing had happened. I was so convinced that he was having someone there that I started searching all over the attic, the cellar, the living room, even the kitchen and the bedrooms, but I found nothing.
L – Thats good though. You should be happy then
A – No, actually I was getting so caved up because I was so certain I was right that I had a heart attack and died from the exhaustion and stress from searching the whole house.
L – I wish you would have searched in the Freezer as well and we might have been alive yet both of us !!!