Posts tagged ‘Measurements’

Bonus for Veterans…

The US army have too many soldiers, and so the army offers some of the veterans a special bonus to retire.

They are war heroes so they are being asked to pick any two points on their body to be measured in a straight line and they will be paid 200 $/1 cm…

The first soldier asks to be measured from the top of his head to his toes : 1.80m, he gets 36 000$!!

The second one raises his arms and asks to be measured from his fingers to his toes : 46 000$.

The third soldier, an old vet says he wants to be measured from his penis to his testicles …
The guys around him all say : come on!! Think twice, you can get better measurements and better money!!  “No”, he says, “I want to get measured by a military doctor”..

The veteran meets with the Doctor privately. The veteran pull his pants down and the doctor starts to measure his penis and suddenly stops! -“But where are your Testicles??”

And the veteran replies : “In Vietnam”….

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Exam Questions – and Answers…

No matter how far our exams are dumbed down, it seems it’s not far enough for today’s pupils. 

But rather than admit defeat in the face of tricky questions, some decide to take a more creative approach to their answers.
After scouring exam papers and speaking to teachers, humorist Richard Benson has collected the worst student howlers in a new book.
You won’t know whether to laugh – or cry. 
 

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